Confessions of a trainee academic

Any day now I am sure I will be outed, exposed as some kind of pretender to the throne of academic thought. So I’ll get in first with a confession: I’m making it all up as I go along. Or at least it feels like it.

In conversation, I often struggle to remember the names of those authors whose writing speaks to me. My head sometimes feels like it’s so full of ideas that crucial information just doesn’t stick. Sometimes I feel like a total fraud, unsure of my own fledgling arguments and wandering lines of thought.

But it's okay, because I am not alone in this.

One of the best things I did at the start of 2010 was to attend a short course run by the Learning Skills centre at uni. It was called ‘Making a first class start to your Honours year’, and one of the first things the presenter said was that each and every one of us sitting there probably felt like a bit of a fraud. That we somehow weren’t worthy of the expectations associated with postgraduate study and couldn’t attain the levels of discipline and knowledge required, but that we were also quite wrong. I can still remember the audible sigh of relief that rippled around the room as we turned to the person next to us and gave them a nervous, understanding smile.

We’d been rumbled – but it was okay, it was normal, we weren’t alone in having these anxieties. Maybe we could do this after all.

And yet, the self-doubt remains.

Blue's views

Oh, hai there :)

Thanks for dropping by. As you can see, I really like the new pad - especially the deck. I think the humans have done rather well.

But, I have to tell you, there have been some strange things going on lately. Firstly, mum spent ages putting up all these little marker flags on the walls & ceilings, and then she got grumpy at me when I proved to be awesome at catching them. I liked the ones halfway up the wall... they were especially fun.

Every smile counts

Today is census day here in NZ - it was supposed to happen 2 years ago but a rather disruptive earthquake sequence put paid to that. It was quickly realised, by the powers-that-be, that any data collected was going to be horribly skewed by the mass exodus of people escaping Shakeytown, and tracking down everyone left behind would be near impossible. So, we do it today instead.

I filled out my census form online - quick and easy! I really liked the fact there was a helpful explanation on how to account for time spent off-site due to earthquake issues. It's a good feeling to be back on our little plot o'land - taking into account the two years spent away, we've been living here for 11 years.

There are a number of other things that have made me smile in recent times so, in no particular order, here's a few:

 Cafe in Hobart, Australia
(the name was waaay better than the coffee)

Cat busting out Tetris shapes on the bed

In the key of B

Bad blogger

Naughty, irresponsible, slack-ass blogger. Yep, that's me.
By the end of 2012, after about 2 years of almost-constant deadlines & responsibilities, I took total advantage of the lack of external deadlines in January by ignoring all the self-imposed ones as well. It's not that I wasn't doing anything - I got all sorts of stuff done over the Xmas break - I just became temporarily averse to writing of any kind.

So, to make up (a little) for the deafening silence of late, here's a rather long and rambling update in the key of B.*

(*Why? No reason really, just 'cos)

Poptimist ahoy

Earlier this month, I spent a few days in Hobart while attending the IASPM-ANZ conference.This is my favourite photo from the trip, taken on the first afternoon during a random walkabout. In the background is the conference venue, the UTAS School of Art - a converted jam factory on the waterfront.

Old rockers never die, they just move to Hobart :)

Brightly painted fishing boats and floating restaurants dominate Hobart harbour - rather a nice change from the hulking great container ships that are prominent in Lyttelton. It was also nice to spend some time surrounded by old buildings again, wandering anywhere the mood suggested and not having to constantly worry about cordons, road closures and demolition sites.

Great trips always feature the unexpected - that moment or place that will stay with you for ever. This trip had two - a moment and a place that were both surprising and memorable.

2012 Days of Xmas

Another year, another version!
(a bit late in the season, but never mind... cheers!)

On the first day of Xmas, my true love gave to me...

A payout from the EQC.

On the second day of Xmas, my true love gave to me...

Two shining rainbows, 

and a payout from the EQC.

On the third day of Xmas, my true love gave to me...

Three fearless leaders, 

two shining rainbows, and a payout from the EQC.

Radio With Pictures

I spent most of last week thinking and talking about music, radio, music, documentaries, music, research and more music. With a little bit of 'life-after-devastation' thrown in for good measure. Many people I spoke to asked how the rebuild was going, and most were taken aback when I replied that, for the most part, we aren't up to the rebuilding bit yet - we're still in the demolition phase.

The ongoing effects of disaster don't usually filter through to overseas news outlets. People living in other countries would be forgiven for thinking that we must be over it by now. We've got funky container shops and a new sports stadium - we've even hosted a rugby test - so if Lonely Planet says we're cool, then it must be all better, right?

I wish it was.